Daddy knows BEST!

When you are leading a business, it is easy to join the ranks of the overwhelmed. You start the day with good intentions to grow the business and attend to your personal obligations, but at day's end, you may find you have accomplished very little. Growing up, I always remember my father telling me to work smarter, not harder. I am consistently trying to find ways to streamline my days in order to work smarter and not harder. To stop becoming overwhelmed, first congratulate yourself on your achievements. Then forgive yourself for what you haven't finished. Balance comes from not letting the magnitude of the work get the best of you. To achieve success, planning is the ultimate tool for increasing productivity and reducing stress. Move forward positively by working smart with these steps:

1. Remember happiness is your end game. Of all the people I've met, the happiest are those who have treated their lives and businesses like a journey of discovery. Instead of stopping when you become frustrated, simply decide on the best action you can take, and take it. Your willingness to deal with all obstacles, no matter what, gives you the confidence and strength you need to achieve success.

2. Create specific short-term goals. So much changes so quickly in today's world that your long-term goals will have to be modified as you learn what works and what doesn't. Break your larger goals into realistic short-term goals. If you want to get a book published, for instance, start by writing articles on your area of expertise.

3. Develop a nightly to-do list. Keep yourself on track by breaking short-term goals into realistic steps you can take immediately. In a to-do notebook, focus your intentions by writing down the tasks you want to achieve the next day. Don't set yourself up for failure by putting too many items on your list. Break major tasks into even smaller components that are easy to accomplish. I don’t know about you, but nothing satisfies me more than when I can check off items on my to-do list. As you take action, your frequent successes will motivate you to push forward.

4. Evaluate and learn from your actions. At the end of the day, congratulate yourself for what you've accomplished, and let go of what you have not. Review what you have learned, and decide on the next best action to take to reach your short-term goals. Develop a new to-do list every night by transferring your unfinished items and prioritizing the new list.

5. Realize you don't have to do this alone. As you grow the business, many tasks become routine and can be accomplished by someone else. Develop a list of these tasks, and delegate them. When you mentor and train your staff to help carry the responsibilities of the business, you will be amazed at what they can do.

Working smarter and not harder is part of the intimate dance of balancing work and personal life. That work-life balance is the ever elusive search for that middle ground where we will be pleasantly busy and challenged and yet able to enjoy life as it comes. It is a constant work in progress and I find that there is not just one way of achieving it. What three things can you do in order to achieve more balance for the next 30 days?

Thanks Daddy for helping me to work smarter more often than harder! I love you!

True leaders come in pink tennis shoes and jeans!

True leaders are mentors with a servant's heart. These are not just pretty words to fill out space. If you are NOT a true servant with a true passion for helping people you will not be a true leader in the real sense of the word. It is that simple. You may be doing well and have a list of people listening to your advices, but that alone does not make you a leader. People are not numbers you can just add on your email list or connection networks. They are people with dreams and goals like you. As a true leader, it should be your goal to lead people to where they want to be.

Being a leader, is not something you have to be born with. You can develop the qualities of a leader by being a good follower. True leaders, however, are not average people, they must be above average. I mean by this, that if you are an everyday average person, you are most likely a follower, not a leader. Once you become a leader, your thoughts, actions, and achievements will be above average, because you will be reacting differently than the average person. So what does a leader look like?

Look at the young girls that are shown in this picture. They are a true depiction of leadership in its purest form. I understand that we typically do not think of leadership in jeans and pink tennis shoes, but maybe that is part of the problem. We often expect to see leadership in a certain “format” and we miss all of the magical leaders that have the potential of changing the world. We walk right by the ones that would most likely soar above any of the others because we have a narrow predetermined vision of what it “should” be.

The girls that you see here have decided to take the reality of their life, learn from it and focus on others so that they can make a difference for the generation that will walk after them. Before they were a decade old, they had already set their legacy in motion. Three of the four children that you see here have terminal cancer. Their dream of life and what they and their families thought that it could be have been shattered by the hard and cruel facts of reality. They could choose to get lost in that reality and lose their dreams, and yet they are finding the empowerment in the journey. That is right! They have chosen to NOT be a VICTIM but have made a decision to embrace empowerment. The journey is the part of life where we must consciously choose to capture the lessons from the darkest of our experiences and focus outward on other people. This is the trait of a real leader. This is where the reward happens. Not just a reward for you and the individual that you focus on but also with all of the people that they interact with. It is a true ripple effect.

These girls have inspired a foundation called “Friends Helping Friends” (http://www.fhfproject.com/). They are dedicated to raising awareness of childhood cancer, raising research dollars for it and identifying children in their county that are experiencing it so that they can teach them how to lead in jeans and pink tennis shoes too! In the last two years they have raised countless spirits, pulled a community together, inspired numerous other businesses to get involved and have raised over $75,000. Beyond that, they are inspiring a movement of people. They have a level of influence that most leaders only dream of. When they enter a room, it is like a magnet. People stop and are automatically mesmerized. Not because of their lack of hair or the hand tremors from the variety of medicine cocktails that they have to take daily. Not by far! They have a special twinkle in their eye and energy in their step. They chose to see the light in the darkest of closets and the good in the shadiest of people. They truly have a different perspective on life and appreciate and value all that come across their path. Like I said, a true depiction of leadership in its purest form.

Excuse me. I must go now. I need to go and find a cute pair of pink tennis shoes and play webkins with the girls. If I am observant enough, I might learn a thing or two about leadership!

The sweet taste of success!

As we move into the 2008 year, it will be essential to “kick it up a notch” in order to lead the change in your industry. Regardless of your "industry" you have competition. Your customers have so many choices and as soon as you think they are "YOUR" customers, you better stop and think again. In order to be the leader in your "neck of the woods", it is going to take dedication, renewed passion and a committed focus to leadership. Leadership is the art of motivating a group of people to act towards achieving a common goal. Leadership is certainly the ability to influence others. Put even more simply, the leader is the inspiration and director of the action. He or she is the person in the group that possesses the combination of personality and skills that makes others want to follow his or her direction. Your leadership will dictate the experience that your customer has and that will determine if they choose to “promote” your business and bring their dollars back to your window….or take them to the competitor down the street.

In business, leadership is welded to performance. Effective leaders are those who increase their bottom line by increasing their teams’ lives and performance as well as their professional performance. If you want to survive and ride the wave of change successfully, there is NO OTHER choice than to commit to being a leader and through example and raising the bar of expectations, increasing your teams’ performance.

I look forward to seeing you raise the bar of performance for yourself and your team in 2008. The taste of success is sweet (almost as sweet as Chocolate Lovers Trash…..a Bruster’s Real Ice Cream ROCKIN flavor) and it is worth every effort put forth in order to experience it.

How are you going to commit to "kicking it up a notch" in 2008? Remember, destiny is choice and not chance and YOU are the only one that controls it!!

Making a difference in your leadership influence

When I think of someone that has great influence and people skills I think of the award winning journalist, Wes Sarginson. (See picture of Wes and I at a recent event.) Wes has accomplished so much and yet he is the most down to earth person I know. When he is in a crowd, people are drawn to him and he has a way of making you feel like you are the only person on the planet when he is talking to you. His people skills have helped make him a great leader. People skills, you either have them or you don't. True - up to a point. Some leaders are great at getting from their people exactly what is vital and important and others, well, let's say, less so. Still, for all there is hope to make progress, by focusing on some key points to build leadership influence quickly and effectively, just by knowing how to handle your people better.

Here are the ten key areas you want to look at - in yourself...

Listen Well~It will come as no surprise, but the way you consciously, deeply listen to what others have to say to you is vital. Ask secondary questions. Be more interested in them than in yourself.

Recognize and Take Opportunities~Any and every interaction is an opportunity for this. Make the most of every chance you have for making a difference to someone. I realize that this is a cliché but, often times you only have one chance to interface with that person and your investment in them may be exactly what they need to develop to the next level. It also speaks volumes about your true intentions.

Build Positive Relationships~Whatever the stresses and strains you are under, take a deep breath when you are going to talk with someone. Your personal state makes a difference - and they notice. 'Respond' rather than 'react' - there's a difference.

Appreciate Others Efforts~People try hard to do their best. Start with that premise and you will be making a difference wherever you go. It's often not the girl-on-the-end-of-the-phone's fault - she's probably having a tough day herself. It's not the harassed shop assistant's fault. Seek to understand.

Say 'Thank You' Often, Easily, and Genuinely ~WOW!! This is one winning strategy. Try it the next time you are out and about. Try telling one of your team members thank you…just for being them and helping your organization become what it is today. Be prepared for them to light up like a pin ball machine…..and then they will give you the “what do you want…..” look! (By-the-way, it makes you feel great too!)

See Positives In Everyone~There are positives in everyone. It's not about them, it's about you. The most aggressive and challenging person has energy! There are true positives in everyone and as challenging as it may be, your task is to recognize and value that everyone has something to offer! The best leaders find it and leverage it - for everyones benefit.

Be Gentle To Your People~Courtesy, kindness, understanding - all words hardly befitting leading edge, tough & laser focused business leaders. Ah, but that's where you might be wrong. Business focus can be as sharp as you like, but that still means you treat people well. At the bottom of it all, they are human, just like you. They want acknowledgement, understanding and support. By supporting them when they need support, they will support you.

Be Generous With Others~In life there are many opportunities to give. Of time; of money; to things that need your support. Rarely will you be so short on resources that you can't afford to support, in some small way, someone else. The key to this is being organized enough to have margins in your life. Don’t live so close to the edge of your finances, your time or your energy that you will not be able to be generous with others when the time comes. When you have healthy margins, you can seize the opportunities when they come.

Accept Gratitude Back~ Treat inbound thanks and gratitude well! By taking these 'gifts' in a gracious, appreciative way, you build relationships. Many leaders have a difficult time accepting positive feedback. When you do not graciously accept it, the perception is that you are very ego driven. A true leader with a servant attitude is not ego driven (or at least they don’t let it show.) People feel good around you when you let them into your heart.

It is about you too! Don't forget you. Investing in yourself is the biggest investment you can make. Making a difference is about being accepting of yourself in all of the above. Take time to appreciate you and what you do - you are a truly great person. So accept it with good grace! Being outwardly self confident and transparent is even more attractive then having “run way model beauty.” People want to be around leaders that are energetic, confident and beautiful. It is contagious!

Successful leadership is truly about being able to influence others. Investing, developing and equipping your team is a great place to start. You can not focus on others, however, until you evaluate qualities in yourself first. You can not develop in others what you do not have. These ten easy steps will help increase your leadership influence and increase your business productivity. It takes time, courage and honesty to get focus on these because you have to honestly evaluate yourself and your behaviors. It is always easier to point the finger outward when things are not going right. Always remember, however, when you are pointing your finger at someone else, you have four fingers pointing back at you.

I received an email from Sarah, a former client, today. She wanted to tell me a gentleman, who had attended one of the training programs I presented to her organization, over two years prior, had died of lung cancer. She wanted to tell me about Jim’s passing, because my program had made an impact on him. Sarah also knew my memories of him would make me smile - they did.

I only worked with Jim and about 40 of his co-workers for two days, but I remember him clearly. He was a portly man, with a great smile, and a wonderful attitude about life. When he participated in my training program, he was one year away from retirement. However, unlike many other employees at that stage of employment, he still participated willingly in the training program. He wanted to learn whatever he could to become a better person, a better employee, and a better support to his customers. He was THE person in this particular training group who was the target of many jokes - and he loved every moment of it. Of course, because he was kind and supportive of what I was sharing with his group, there were good-natured cat-calls thrown his way including "Teacher's Pet." With each one, he'd just smile and laugh along. Whenever he could make someone else smile or laugh - a colleague or customer - to Jim, that was an opportunity not to be missed.

I thought I'd share Jim’s story with you in the hopes that you take a moment to ask yourself - How will my colleagues, employees, customers, vendors, and others remember me when I no longer work here? Will they remember me and smile? Will they consider the time they knew me to be of value to them? Will they remember something I taught them? Will they be inspired to do something I used to do? Will they help someone else because they remember how I helped them? OR, will they remember me, shake their heads, and forget me?

If we run through these self-reflection questions, we may become even better leaders. If my employees remember me and smile, they may have liked me as a person because they felt I liked THEM as people too. If they consider the time they worked with me as VALUABLE, I must have helped them to achieve something good or to improve in some way. If they remember something I TAUGHT them, I must have helped them grow as professionals and as people. If they aspire to emulate me, I must have been a solid ROLE MODEL for them. If they help someone else because I HELPED them, I must have 'been there for them' when they needed me. However, if they simply shake their heads and easily forget me, I didn't fulfill the true responsibilities of my job: I failed to lead people, I only managed resources.

Thanks Jim. You can still make me smile.

What’s your legacy?

No Crabs for ME!

This weekend, our family had the pleasure of spending a couple of days on the beach with our friends the Henderson’s. They are a very fun loving Christian family with two little girls that are the same age as our boys. The kids had a great time playing on the beach together. My favorite time on the beach is sunset. The colors are so vivid with unbelievable shades of color, blended perfectly with an artistic touch that is nothing short of magical. While walking with the kids on the beach one night we noticed that it looked like the sand was moving. As we peered closer, it was actually ghost crabs scurrying across the sand. They were busily working to excavate their homes in the sand and defend their territory to other crabs. We ran into the house to get flashlights and we went on an official crab hunt.

We enjoyed our crab hunts and the time spent with the Henderson’s. There are a few relationships that you have in life that you work hard at preserving. They not only are enjoyable, but they fill you up as well. If you are lucky, you find others that you are so connected with that they actually challenge and push you to grow and not be content with simply being “better.” They push you to be the “best.” The best in: your personal growth, in your spiritual relationships, in your family dynamics, and in your professional growth. They help to propel you to achieve your dreams and climb to extraordinary heights. The Henderson’s are one of the relationships in our life that help us strive to be the best.

From birth to adulthood we learn to become good citizens and well-adjusted adults in the world of work and life. Many people make this transformation relatively successfully and lead somewhat normal, happy lives. Some people make it to adulthood grumbling and blaming the world for all the "bad things" it brings their way. Others can't make the adjustment at all and wind up as less than productive members of society.

What I'll call the "normal" group - the one that achieves a somewhat happy existence - learns to live by a set of rules, norms, and expectations that often limit their growth, potential, and true greatness. They are typically content with mediocrity and if they can move from being “good” to being “better” they are satisfied. They most always surround themselves with other’s like them or potentially a little under their “perceived” performance level with the psychological interpretation that if you surround yourself with those that you perceive to be “under you”, the higher you stand (and the better you feel about yourself.)

A few members of this "normal" group discover something special about themselves, they make a choice to excel, and then take action to create the life of their dreams. They are willing to take informed risks and even though the unknown is scary, they will explore it to find the opportunity that quietly awaits there. They choose to find what their strengths are and they capitalize on those. They strive to be the best. They are not content with simply striving for “better.”

You see, the normal group wants its members to be just normal. By the way, work groups and some families act in the same manner. They discourage their members from getting ahead (of the other normal group members).

The Normal Group is what I will call “Crabby.”

If you've ever been crabbing, you've seen the "normal" group in action!

You catch crabs by inserting dead bait fish into a wire crab trap. You then lower it to the bottom of the bay. Crabs attach themselves to the meat and begin eating. You raise the meat and catch the crabs in a net. Then you throw the crabs into a bucket to keep them from running around the boat and pinching people.

Watch the crabs and you will see that as soon as one crab tries to escape the bucket by climbing out, the other crabs will pull it back down into the bucket. There's no escape from the bucket. Life is often like that. A person wants to get ahead and knows that there is more to work and life than what they are presently experiencing.

It is time for you to get out of the bucket!

It takes personal leadership to become aware that escaping the normal is possible. It takes personal leadership to choose and commit to creating the best life that you can. It takes personal leadership to take the actions necessary to propel yourself and create the new future you imagine and want. Part of escaping the normal is also choosing to surround yourself with others like the Henderson’s that will push you to be the best. The other part is investing in others to help them grow and get out of the bucket as well. By helping other’s stand tall and strong, it actually enhances your success.

You can do it. . . All things are possible. Don't let the other crabs in your life prevent you from developing your unique potential and discovering your greatness.

Friends Helping Friends Picture

Thought you would enjoy a picture of the girls that are "driving" the Friends Helping Friends project this year. Erin Streeter (bottom left) and Terry Milling (above her) are the founding members of this project. They decided to extend their hearts and include Arianna (next to me) and Faith (below her). It is amazing to watch the girls create a movement within the community! I appreciate them sharing their lives with us, it is not an easy thing to do when you are facing such adversity. I learn something new every time I am around them. Consciously developing and investing in others is so critical at any stage. I am watching these young girls learn the principles of investing in others and as they are doing so, they are getting stronger, despite all of the illness that surrounds their life. Every life they touch, is richer because of it! Check out their website at http://www.fhfproject.com. For a listing of events coming up go to http://www.brusters.com/mcdonough

Rock on GIRLS! I love you! Christina